Parce que c'est fun.

Je me sens obligé de vous faire partagé cette génèse des clans vampires selon les Malkaviens.
Ca vaut sont pesant de cacahouètes^^.

Elephant and the Blind Vampire Bats


Once upon a time there were seven blind bats. Or thirteen... i forget. Anyway, they were a bit hungry for fresh blood, because they were Vampire blind bats, so they looked around for something to bite. Except they couldn't look around, as they were blind, which you should have realized already.

But their unerringly keen senses of smell led them to a plump, juicy, blood-filled elephant - which in this story stands for all reality. Got it?

The Gangrel bat bumbed into the tail and said, Aha! this elephant is really a twitching animal! That is what I shall become.

The Brujah broke his fangs trying to bite the hoof and said, Aha! The elephant is like a hard, stony, insensate pestle that crushes all beneath it with pitiless abandon! That is what I shall become.

The Nosferatu bat flew into the elephant's butt and said, Aha! The elephant is really a wrinkled, stinky, puckerede, desiccated mass that lives in a dank cave! That is what I shall become.

The Tremere bit the head and said, Aha! The elephant is really a puny little brain struggling to control a vast and powerful body! That is what I shall become.

The Ventrue felt the legs, and sai, Aha! The elephant is really a powerful, upstanding pillar that can bear all weight with strength, but with very little suppleness or resilience! That is what I shall become.

The Toreador felt the trunk and mouth and said, Aha! The elephant is really a great, firm shaft or a warm, moist hole! That is what I shall become.

And the Malkavian bat, blinder than all the rest, swooped down and managed to miss the entire elephant. Aha! said the benighted Malkavian, as it flapped past. The others are making a huge fuss over an elephant that is really a big lot of nothing! Well that is what I shal become.

And so, I say unto you, flap on!

Apocryphal later additions:

"The Assamite vampire bat landed on a tusk, and thought, 'This elephant is a dense, smooth, sharp blade that surely must stab everything in sight and Drain Its Blood In A PSYCHOTIC BLEND OF STYLE AND RABID HUNGER!!! That is what I shall become!' (All the other vampire bats, upon hearing this - because they were blind, not deaf - edged away from the Assamite vampire bat. To this very night, the poor Assamite vampire bat is STILL hungry, because there's no blood in the tusks, see?)

The Cappacocian/Giovanni vampire bat landed on the elephant's ear, and thought, 'Ahah! This is a thin, emaciated, cold rag of a beast! That is what I shall become!' Eventually it learned how to talk to the ear, which naturally was a very good listener, but couldn't really play Jenga (tm) when the Cappadocian/Giovanni vampire bat asked.

The Ravnos vampire bat also landed on the tail, but at the very tip, which was busy trying to shoo the Nosferatu vampire bat away from the elephant's behind, and thought, 'The elephant is exactly what I conceived it would be - a loose, hairy stump that never remains in one place for long! This is what I shall become!'

The Setite vampire bat, who wasn't quite as blind as the rest, but had a mean streak of hubris, latched on to the elephant's underbelly and thought, 'The elephant is a great, soft, squishy beast that lives in eternal darkness to protect itself! That is what I shall become!' (All the other vampire bats, except the Nosferatu vampire bat, snickered a little.)

The Lasombra vampire bat, who by this time was used to flapping around blind, sidled up to all the other vampire bats, who refused to let them join in their feasting, so the Lasombra vampire bat settled on stealing a little bit from all of them and then went back to its dark, cold, lonely cave, and thought, 'The elephant isn't so great - I didn't want a piece of it anyway!' (The Lasombra vampire bat didn't become much of anything, but only took the credit for having tasted all parts of the elephant.)

The Tzimisce vampire bat opened one of its eyes, saw the elephant, and decided to eat the whole thing.

C'est.... pour le moins special.

Si spécial veut dire génial, je suis d'accord^^

excellent !!!